You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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