ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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