Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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