fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
