This girl is more easily done than said...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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