By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just want nice things and good sex
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
