I must be too annoying 4 u.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
