i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
