Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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