Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
