Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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