Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
