So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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