I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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