I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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