And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
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