It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Sorry my hands just texted you
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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