what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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