So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Acid is not a monday night drug
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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