Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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