I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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