i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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