Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize