Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Randomize
