Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
