Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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