I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
