walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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