i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
