Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
