apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
