Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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