I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
