Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
