Will you blow on my dice?
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I didn't notice because vodka
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
