I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
