i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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