I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I understand Curling. That high.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
