Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
