please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
