Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Are my feet made of real feet?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
