Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
