Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
