Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
