It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
