what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
