D3 body, D1 cock
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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