Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
