I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
