These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
